God provides.

they were the ones that God led me to when i needed someone the most. today, one of the hardest days for me God gave me a way.
i walked to church feeling at my lowest then there was so many people at the elevator so i walked up, as i walked i saw them there. just when i needed someone, God provided. i felt so sad missing the prayer and praise day too...i couldn't believe i missed out on so much. but was it in my hands to stop everything? no, it wasn't. i managed to come out but at what stakes? i never know what i'll expect once i come home. why is this...i reallly really wanted to come out so i could give king his present too. as i was there, all of them there just made me smile. it really did. i couldn't bring myself to smile. i just couldn't, all i felt was sorrow and pain. but God provides. He gave me my friends that would put a smile on my face. kingston opening his presents, elaine feeding me and carmen being called courtney x) they are the best. no more sorrow, no more pain

i would like to "reinvent" myself. it's like baptism which i won't be able to attend....